Hotties and Smarties

Speech for Chabad Founders’ Dinner – March, 2005

Good evening. Did you have a good time? Let’s have a hand for Chaplain Goldstein and his uplifting speech. And how about the young ladies from the seminary – did they speak well tonight? Let’s give them a hand, also!

You know, as I listened to the girls’ speeches , it reminded me of a funny incident that happened when I taught Sunday School a few years ago. It was at another synagogue, a pre-Bar Mitzvah class with 12 year old boys and girls, and we were discussing marriage. The topic was: "What is the most important quality in your future husband or wife?"

A sweet young girl in the front immediately raised her hand and said, and I quote, "My future husband’s name is his most important quality."

His name, I wondered? Has she been studying Kabalah already? Numerology? Astrology? So I asked her, "What is there about his name you consider important?"

She answered, "I want it to include an MD at the end."

Then she added, "And it wouldn’t hurt if his student loans were paid off before we were married."

The rest of the girls agreed with her. Among the boys, the consensus was different:

"I want to marry a ‘hottie’," they told me.

A hottie? Now, this term did not come from my generation, but I still managed to derive its meaning.

When one of the boys added, and I quote, "Jewish girls are NOT hotties," civil war broke out in the classroom. The girls took major exception to this.

I’m telling you, I wish those Sunday school boys were here tonight, so they could see firsthand that Jewish girls can be "hotties" … and as I look out into the audience here tonight, I can verify that Jewish women can remain "hotties" into their 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s, 70’s and beyond. Men, let’s have a hand for the "hotties!"

Now, I brought up that amusing incident for a reason. I would like to end tonight’s dinner by talking briefly, and seriously, about Chabad’s Seminary program.

The program started with a question. We asked, "Who are the future leaders in the Jewish world, and how can we have a part in educating or training them, given the fact our political system is inadequate, at best?"

If you think about it, perhaps you will come to the same conclusion we did – that Chabad is in the forefront of Jewish leadership. They have an army of leaders, over 3,000 of them, situated all around the world. They call them Shaliachs. Each day, these 3,000 leaders wake up, pray for strength, and then do what a leader is supposed to do – improve the world around them. We are blessed to have five of these leaders in Southwest Florida, Rabbi Jacobson in Port Charlotte, Rabbi Lubkovsky in Cape Coral, Rabbi Greenberg in Bonita Springs, Rabbi Fishy in Naples, and of course, Rabbi Minkowicz in Fort Myers. Let’s have a hand for them, too, for their tireless work in improving our lives!

So when we thought about leadership, our first impulse was to start a young men’s yeshiva.

Then Nechamie spoke up. Sweet, quiet, un-argumentative Rebbetzin Minkowicz. She made the case that when you examine the day to day struggle to improve ourselves, our families, and our communities, Jewish women, Jewish wives, and Jewish mothers are just as much our leaders as their husbands. Some may argue even more so.

My answer to that was: "That is the most …. interesting thing I have heard in a long time."

With that in mind, Chabad designed a young women’s seminary program, with an accent on leadership. But how do you teach leadership?

First, we wanted to give the girls a solid religious education, steeped in Torah, in Jewish law, and Kabalah – not Madonna Kabalah, but the real thing. Six Rabbis, along with Nechamie, guided this program. I don’t know if you have ever had the privilege of being in one of Nechamie Minkowicz’s classes, but she is one of the best teachers I have ever seen.

Next, the seminary girls did outreach. As you have heard, some assisted in the Chabad pre-school program, some taught older children, and most visited the sick in hospitals. During Holiday Season, some of the braver ones stood outside Publix, with the Salvation Army bell ringing in their ears, and they went to the Edison Mall, among the Christmas crowds.

They asked people walking by, "Are you Jewish?" … "Are you Jewish, Mister? Are you Jewish, M’am?" and then they handed out menorahs to Jews who had forgotten about Chanukah. Forgotten about Chanukah? Can you imagine the state of someone’s Judaism who forgets about Chanukah?

We also wanted to give them what we called "reality based training". Many of these girls will marry shaliachs, and full-time rabbis. I don’t know if you are aware of it, but many people come to a Rabbi and his wife seeking counseling, a sympathetic ear. Perhaps there is a family member in trouble, or health problems, or God-forbid, a death. We brought in a practicing psychologist to teach the girls counseling skills to help them in the future.

Now, it has been rumored David Goldberg, the accountant, took the girls to the Mall to teach them shopping skills, and I want to dispel that rumor right now. David did not conduct a class in shopping. The girls needed no help there. Many of them already had 10th degree black belts from Bloomingdale’s before they arrived here. David, did, however, give them a very important reality based skill. He showed them how to balance a check book, after they were done shopping.

Also added to the curriculum was public speaking classes, because when you lead, sooner or later, you will be up in front of people, talking.

I was involved in helping them with this, and together, along with Rebbetzin Sara Ester Crispe, we worked on the speeches you heard tonight. They were told that if they made you laugh, made you cry, or inspired you, they would be rewarded with an expense-paid trip to Israel.

Young ladies, I can tell you now … you will all be in Yerushalayim for graduation.

I’m proud to report to you that we achieved our goals. These girls are now the best examples of young Jewish womanhood that they each can be, proud of their heritage, and able to speak proudly about it.

And those of you that are sitting here, all you supporters of Chabad, you should be proud of Chabad’s seminary program, too, and we invite you to become involved along with us. If you that are interested in the future of the Jewish people, and if you believe, along with us, that now, more than ever, the Jewish people need leaders and especially female leadership, then we welcome and encourage your participation.

Because while it’s a cute thing to be considered a "hottie", it’s not enough for a Jewish woman. For 3,000 years, it has never been enough. A Jewish woman must also be a living example of someone who improves the world.

In other words, she should be "a smartie." A woman of valor. Eyshes hayel.

So, in closing, I want to say, "Todah Rabbah". Thank you for attending Chabad’s Founders Dinner, and taking part in this celebration of Chabad, and Chabad’s involvement in improving our lives. Give yourselves a hand. You’ve been a great audience.

And now I would like to close with one of our religion’s most profound blessings.

"Yivorechah adonoy vayishmorechah."

May God Bless you and watch over you.

Thank you again. And good night.

THE END

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