Sunday, April 30th, 2017

Feminine Multi-Vitamins
by
Zalman Velvel

Alex opened the frig, yawned, scratched, and searched for his vitamins, all at the same time.
 
His trusty One-A-Days were on the top shelf of the door. The bottle felt light. When he shook it, there was silence. As the sleep lifted from his brain, he remembered he swallowed the last pill yesterday. Then he put the bottle back in the frig, in the vain, lazy, hope it would grow more pills overnight.
 
It didn't.
 
Now, he had three choices.
 
Choice 1: He could go without the little pill that made him feel like his body was running smoothly and up to peak performance.
 
Choice 2: On his way to work, he could pick up another bottle at Walgreen's and pop one in his mouth. Then he would be late to the 6 meetings and the salary review ahead of him, all timed from the end of one, to the beginning of another. That would mean making seven phone calls of apology as he pushed back each of the meetings, like dominoes.
 
Or Choice 3: He could take his empty vitamin bottle out of the frig, put it in his coat pocket as a reminder, then take one of his wife's vitamins from the second shelf on the door. This would allow him to pick up a new bottle of One-A-Day's on the way home from work, after being on time for six meetings and his salary review.
 
Choice 3 was the path of least resistance, so he sauntered down that path. He swallowed one of Susie's Feminine Multi-Vitamins and then went to the hallway closet and put his empty bottle in his coat pocket. He barely made it before Susie woke up and called out from the kitchen:
 
"Alex!"
 
"Yes, honey." He sauntered back into the kitchen. It was a morning for sauntering.
 
"Why did you take one of my vitamins?" she held the bottle of Feminine Multi-Vitamins in her hand.
 
 
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© Copyright 2012 by Zalman Velvel Inc.
 
 
You may print this story for yourself, but not make copies without author's permission.
 
 
 

Über den Author: stuv